Even the most prepared and responsible people are allowed to feel overwhelmed by the responsibility of caring for a new animal or baby. You haven’t ruined anything. Luckily I did have an SO to support me through and talk me down. $11.99 ... Blue,S Size 4.1 out of 5 stars 1,836. Dogs adapt easily to new homes especially when young and it would be fairly easy to find someone who would want a puppy/very young dog. Izzadora, good luck with your decision. I love the little guy. We definitely are not a “family” yet. I hired a behaviorist to help me and he is doing a fine job but even he loses his temper with the male and told me to return him as he will get the best of me and is dangerous with his jumping. Also I am a vet so didn’t think I would have any trouble at all. My girl has come out of her shell and no longer rolls over when approached, she holds her head high and is much more lovable and confident. I will reach out to a doctor if this continues the rest of this week. It is so ironic that I received this email on this topic. See my post on Returning a rescue or shelter dog for some support. It’s not even the dogs fault. This particular dog is not right for you, and that’s OK. There’s nothing wrong with the dog and there’s nothing wrong with you. But I love my ball of overwhelming responsibility and I wouldn’t trade him for the world. Thank you all so much….. Nothing beats a reliable support system for those times when you need a helping hand with your puppy or dog! But as my mum had a fear they never did. We have a 4 year old and decided for some crazy reason to get another one. And he was actually a lovely easygoing pup so I felt extremely guilty for regretting getting him (after all, this was what I thought I wanted for years). If you are surprised by that after you take one home, it means you are rather childish. I don’t like that the dog is treated as if it’s more important than I am. As an affiliate, That Mutt earns money from qualifying purchases. I am reading this with an 11 week old MN. An unnatural twisting motion can happen when the foot is planted awkwardly, when the ground is uneven, or when an unusual amount of force is applied to the joint. In fact, we now have two dogs : aged 2 and 3. Both are Havanese males. You can ease into leaving, which is what most people choose to do. That feeling of being a family, instead of having a new puppy, will come soon enough!!! If I had brought him back to the shelter I would have made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. The potty training takes longer than people realize. He is sleeping through the night and going most of the day without accidents. That post gets new comments every week. So sorry you are going through a difficult time with the pup. I’ve wondered so many times if I should take him back to the shelter but instead I just put in a lot of effort to help him. 🙂, This post is very apropos of my feelings this weekend. (He certainly is precious) and thanks for making the rest of us feel more normal!!! What kept me going was reading posts just like this…knowing I wasn’t alone…and in most cases there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Have an honest discussion with your family or roommate. He is gorgeous. If you think your dog might have a fever, contact your vet right away to set up an appointment for an examination and to ensure that your dog receives the … The English Setter is a medium-size breed of dog.It is part of the setter group, which includes the red Irish Setters, Irish Red and White Setters, and black-and-tan Gordon Setters.The mainly white body coat is of medium length with long silky fringes on the back of the legs, under the belly and on the tail. Read on to find out what you can do to make things better. i worried when i got the 2nd girls because my oldest was 8 and she had been an only child so i was worried abt her. They may complain if you leave them alone, but never leaving them alone robs them of the opportunity to learn how to self-soothe and settle. A bruise, or contusion, appears on the skin due to trauma. You make time to go see a mental health professional. To all those surprised by how much attention your dog needs: I think that any responsible adult knows that owning a dog means a lot of extra work. I like my puppy, maybe even love him, and my feelings of anxiety have all but gone. I’m overwhelmed and stressed. Either way, you ultimately may have to return the pup if you can’t get on the same page. My happy-go-lucky fur soulmate was angry with me and became withdrawn – I felt so horrible. They do this for the same reason reputable breeders do – they have the puppy’s or dog’s best interest at heart and truly want to find them their forever home. To see a picture – hit the website link below. Also, I hated mt dog initially but now it's great :) What helps me is knowing I'll be rewarded with an awesome dog who can hold their bladder and won't potty on my floors (currently going through this and counting down the days lol). Link is going through a “fear period” which I’d never even freaking heard of until a few days ago when I was on the internet trying to figure out why this damn puppy is scared of everyone and WHAT DID I DO WRONG?! I think they realized they had gotten in over their heads and were (mostly) thankful that someone stepped in before they got in any real trouble. They absolutely helped. He is fairly well potty trained though and sleeps from 10:30 to 5. I know I am deeply depressed since my mother died recently after I saw her every day and cared for her in all ways I could for several years. The good news is that there ARE solutions for the puppy/doggie blues! For an anxious dog, the next step is to up the ante to growling, baring teeth, snapping or biting, “out of the blue." He’s been a really good puppy! I can’t wait for our first puppy meeting to share your blog with the other new puppy parents from this litter. Your job and your dog aren't going to stop that. Even if you've owned dogs before, or currently, adding a new pack member can still be stressful and surprising in it's responsibilities. It’s just going to take some time, so remember to have some patience and look forward to the activities you were envisioning with them. It's not fun to listen to, but it's not hurting the puppy. She has made my big, old dog so sad. I ended up getting a puppy from a breeder, but initially I was trying to work something out with a rescue. and you will remember this and say to yourself, how could i ever have thought that. He is jealous but learning, I think competition in a litter of 11 was huge. I have to remember that dogs make me happy and are great companions. In the meantime, you’ll be doing a lot of cleaning up after them. Puppies after all mature rather quickly compared to humans and being able to spend more time outside walking, training, playing or just sitting around taking in the scenery made it all much easier. Parasites, including mites and fleas, are the first possible cause your veterinarian will seek to exclude. When we adopted him, he was in the year-and-a-half to two-year-old range, and basically past all the puppy stages. It will get better! Reviewed and updated for accuracy on October 28, 2019 by Dr. Hanie Elfenbein, DVM, PhD . So, if you’re sure you’ve made a mistake, the first step is to contact the breeder, rescue or shelter where you originally got the puppy and talk to them about your options. I find myself wishing to have my life back. He was 7 mos. I wanted a running buddy. We did as much research as we could prior to getting him— breed, gender, breeder, temperament, and what to expect. Well, in our opinion, the Blue Buffalo Wilderness Dry Dog Food is the overall best. I was so happy to come across your story. So going to work makes me feel slightly better until it's almost time to go home and then I get anxious all over again. Puppies are tough. Put him in the down/stay, look into his adorable eyes, and repeat to yourself, “This dog is not possessed. Physical activity . If you’ve recently added a new dog or puppy to your family and you’re wondering if you’ve made a mistake, just know that others go through the same feelings. She takes the male on when he makes her mad and they play happily but aggressively. Andy, now 2.5, has gone on to earn his CGCA, & is a Therapy Dog; protects and checks on Zander frequently at daycare and will push his way thru to get to me. I was very stressed out with my pup Remy. I know myself, I could never get a puppy even though I can see many advantages. I did an extensive amount of research BUT made a very rushed decision at the last moment. I’m unemployed at the moment and thought it was the perfect time for a dog since I’m off, but now I just feel regret because my life is in transition. Mind you the crate is very large it belonged to a German shepherd my cousin had. It’s nothing to do with Remy, really, it’s about having a second dog in general right now. So as pointed out before, life with a puppy or any newly adopted, older dog can and likely WILL be challenging for a while. The ankle joint, which connects the foot with the lower leg, is injured often. You can minimize puppy destruction by offering puppy-specific chews and toys. He’s adorable and has become the building’s puppy. we’ve had him for over a year now , he’s two now and growing up on me so it’s getting easier. i never regretted getting my 3rd girl, i was just worried abt the additional expense. My husband and I had just gotten married and I did not think we were financially ready for it because we could barely afford food of our own. For he and I, it took starting training, and 6 months of time together, and then it was like a light switched. I got so frustrated with him on Friday night that I yelled at him and stuffed him in his crate, because apparently I am about as mature as my 4-month-old puppy. Puppy Blues. As a matter of fact, Barbara had to sign a contract that stated that she would return Wally (his former name was Pablo) to the rescue/contact them for assistance if she could no longer care for him – see below! Training is helping and he excels at what he learns but never uses it when out of class with me. i am sure that you will never regret getting Remy. I’m very thankful it worked out so well for us, I definitely was getting nervous. I work 10 hours a day 6 days a week. Please, any guidance will help me (even when it just comes to overcoming anxiety in general other than talking to a professional as I simply don't have time with a job and the dog). I am crate training but she still does not sleep through. 🙁 I hate I am feeling this. ( it is like being tackled by a football player full on) I know that if I persist I will make him a good dog, it is mostly puppy acts I hope. Remy will give you so much more back in love, companionship, etc. Haha! As a person who suffered from depression and anxiety to the point of not being able to get out of bed regularly at one point in the not-so-distant past, I would really urge you to rethink this and put your mental health and wellbeing first. Puppy Blues: What To Do If You’re Overwhelmed With Your Puppy Results were good; however, Andy was way more social, way more. I’m trying to give him toys when he does and tell him no, but he is not really listening. Hope some of that is helpful. 🙂, I got our puppy yesterday. That is we gave ourselves until his 1st birhtday, and if we (the entire family) believed that it wasn’t working out, we would re-home him. UPDATE: Y'all are the best and thank you so much for your messages so far. I was beginning to feel this way almost immediately after he was brought to our home. Soon Zander will be ; he loves babies, children, other dogs and most people, but still picks on Andy sometimes. He was also very naughty in the evenings when he was actually tired but appeared like he’d had no exercise. I own a dog, so I know what I’m talking about. I have had 2 dogs in my life. I can relate, when I got my 6 month old Beagle mix I did a lot of second guessing. They told me I had to decide if I wanted the dog in two hours because they were going to reserve the dog to go and buy it. But … as with most people I’m 100 percent committed to both dogs and making this work. He’s an awesome dog! We have an 11 week old puppy who is bloody cute! I manged to get back to bed at 6:30, I kept waking but couldn’t hear him so would just go back to sleep. They told me that If I said no they wouldn’t tell him. I guess I am just venting as I cant vent to anybody else in my life as I am afraid of being judged. This helps distribute the natural oils from the coat and stimulates blood supply to the skin, which promotes oil production. This sounds exactly like me a few months ago. I agree. Her baby fears and uncertainty will ease once she sees that when you leave, you always come back. the pet will have a stigma attached to it, because it was returned. Yet, it took Shian nearly six more months before he accepted her – which I knew happened when I saw them finally wrestling with each other both in joy and family love. The support here and IRL is helping so very much as I've heard so many similar stories. They may be older and not appreciate the crazy puppy energy, or they might be jealous. Likewise, your pup will be just fine if you decide it’s best to re-home to a better situation. I say all this to tell you it does get better and become more natural. New audio has been released of a conversation between President Donald Trump (R) and Brad Raffensperger (R), Georgia’s Secretary of State. I had spent months and months researching the exact breed of dog and breeder. After all, one returned dog means that there’s one space less for a dog in need. Linus was my first puppy(as an adult) and after listening to him howl for several days in his crate I was definitely second guessing my decision to get a puppy. He is needy and possessive and something we will work out. So sorry to hear your puppy is causing so much stress. I got him two weeks ago. Thank you for listening. Went to sleep at 8pm and woke at 5am. I also want to add that I felt extra guilty because for the first month I didn’t even really like my puppy. I would imagine that a lioness in the wild would just leave her cubs in the den when she needs to go out to catch food for the family; the cubs, when not protected by mom, might get killed by the snake. He bit my nephews leg. He is what I’ve been wanting for a long time but I am second guessing the timing of my decision. Sometimes it’s just the wrong match. I have been comforted by the nonjudgemental and kind responses written here because I am considering rehoming this puppy. He’s doing incredibly well (despite me having severe puppy blues/anxiety) and is coming on in literal leaps and bounds. The biting … Gets old really fast. In high kill shelters, this is truly a problem because once they’re full, their staff is going to euthanize the dogs (same goes for cats) in order to make room for more. Tofi respects Shian’s hunting prowess and learns from him how to find lizards in the palm trees of Florida. Lots of work, lots of patience and lots of deep breaths and yes some loud commands when I reach my breaking point. Sadly, he was probably from a puppy farm which I didn’t even think of then. We will get there eventually. Up until then it seemed just work w/no pay back & I had no experience with dogs. I’ve had my puppy now for 10 weeks. Let’s just say He is loved and is sssllloowwllyy becoming the dog we all wanted to have. I first adopted a dog a couple years back and, with my anxiety, I threw up the first morning while eating breakfast and couldn't keep any food down either. This can extend into your work routine if you’re used to pulling home office shifts and need quiet time to be productive. Blue Buffalo is a well-known brand of dog food that was founded in Wilton, CT in 2002. 🙂, Oh thank God! Soon Zander grew to be 16+ lbs (again “surprise”) and is a bit of a bully to Andy. He is now 7 and while not perfect, he has made great strides and brings us great joy. To protect him and look after him even if he does roll in duck poop and eat my house plants. I regretted getting him bitterly when I first got him. A dog with severe difficulty breathing may have a tongue that looks purple/blue instead of pink, showing that they are not getting enough oxygen. My husband is being a rock star so far but I can only imagine he will burn out at some point too. Keep reminding yourself that the puppy's basic needs are all being met and that learning how to be alone is good and healthy for her. I could always take her back to the place we adopted her from but then what am I supposed to tell my family. (Fast forward two years and those two are best friends, but that took time to develop.) If you don’t have Dunbar’s book, you can get the older version of it via free pdf download (just google Ian Dunbar pdf). Wow, great story and good post. For puppy and dog training tips, see my ebook, “50 Dog Training Tips: Your Training Problems Solved Now.”. I have had dogs all my life and at present have the best one (who drove me crazy for three years as a puppy), that I have ever had the pleasure to share my life with. It’s just that life never goes as smoothly as you imagine. The female is very independent and pleasant natured so they make an interesting and challenging combo of pups. But then I said okay and we called his dad and said yes to the dog. It can be so hard to make that decision and say, “Hey, I have this dog. Have any of you experienced “puppy blues”? I'm also scared if I stay home all day rather than go to work it will almost make me feel worse as I won't have time to be sick as the puppy will need attention. Mitral stenosis is a valvular heart disease characterized by the narrowing of the orifice of the mitral valve of the heart. With a pup the first night is hell. I honestly wanted to give him back to the breeder because I felt it was taking such a toll on my mental health. I can’t tell you how many times I said (or, um, yelled,through angry tears) that I wished we’d never got Hiccup when we were dealing with the worst of his separation anxiety and I felt like a prisoner in my home. Maria, I came across this site because I am feeling really depressed about my decision to take a puppy my daughter’s dog ‘accidentally’ produced (yes, I know she was irresponsible). I've only seen one other post covering the severity of the puppy blues I am experiencing this right now but I apologize if this is a tired topic. I'm hesitant to think it's a bug because I don't feel nauseated before throwing up, just very very panicked. Hang in there!!! Fingers crossed. BUT…everyday gets better and he has changed our hearts in so many ways. I'm glad you are feeling better nowadays!!! Thank you! Unless you plan to give up the rest of your life and spend 24/7 with your dog, this skill is vital. Yet, there is a part of me that wishes I had stayed with Shian only – my relationship with Shian never returned to its original place – Tofi still is the dominant member of this triad – and taking care of a Great Collie’s need for mental and physical exercise is a never-ending task. You make adjustments, you get creative, you work through the problems. Thank you Lindsay for your blog it’s truly been helpful. I love him more than any other dog I have ever owned. Hang in there, Kate! Barbara Rivers contributed to this article. I'd love to feel normal for like an hour! I put an ad in the local Pennysaver, a couple with two boys and a farm called–we talked and they came to get her. It keeps my expectations in check. Everyone told me I was nuts and maybe I was and sometimes I think I am but then, I look at these two sweethearts when they are good and I melt like butter. she loves our me time together. I’ve yelled at Remy many times. I will never give him up!!!! I really want this to work but thinking long term….my mum and dad both have arthritis so will struggle looking after him. I cried when that happened. She writes regularly for That Mutt and is a blogger, raw feeder and dog walker. I know you want to do everything right, but I hope you can step back for a minute. If they’re not, the puppy is bound to cause arguments. old & fortunately house-broken but that was about it. And your husband should be able to take on some responsibility with the dog. The new version is inexpensive too and I recommend it but if you want to start right away you can download the pdf free and start reading immediately. seen only on dog site. We instantly got him off and he drew blood. Second, remember this is all temporary. So shes basically confined to her crate all day. Your comment is a really judgemental and quite a cruel one for people who are in doubt of their decisions. I would give it 48 more hours or so and then do what you think is best. I love him very much but often wonder what the heck did I just do. Sometimes, rescues and breeders are overwhelmed with all their work and may not have time or energy to offer you any support. Everywhere we go folk stop me and wanna play, take pics and love up on him. Haha! There are many different options, such as: A dog trainer. I am so glad I came across this blog, it has given me hope at a time when I’ve never felt quite so low. I had to return a dog I planned to adopt because of her serious prey drive around my cat. Now he’s started jumping up on my back when I’m sitting or even trying to play, it’s trying. Of course, with a puppy, your body isn’t awash with hormones like it is after giving birth, and the enormity of the responsibility is not on the same scale. The dogs are pretty separate … we’re working on it! It’s been a week and I’m full of regret! Sure he doesn’t always come when he’s called. He’s overall a good puppy, sweet and smart, I just need to remind myself that this is a phase. even now, she still wont mess with them. Bottom line — things didn’t turn out the way I envisioned, but with continued training, both dogs growing up and patience we are a happy family. FYI: Neither breeders nor shelters or rescues will refund your puppy’s purchase price or adoption fee, which is understandable and fair enough. Of course, people make mistakes. I found this post as i was searching for similar stories to mine. She’s a couple of months now and feel like I am doing everything wrong. Your veterinarian will perform a thorough skin history and physical examination. Honestly I’ve clean forgotten what it felt like to be crying over a puddle of puppy wee on the doormat. Besides food, beds, leashes, collars, and toys, there’s always vet costs. I was about to return Tofi to the farm but asked her if she would be willing to make changes – and by some miracle in 30-60 days – Tofi learned to respect Shian’s space (that is – his ball) and to allow Shian to be petted and respect his sleeping space – and to stop playing rough with him. I’m only a little over two months in, and it’s much easier now. Usually any “doubts” are just growing pains you can work through. I know either decision is hard, Your email address will not be published. My last dog was a sweet chocolate lab that I adopted when he was 3, he was so easy and a perfect companion for me that I thought I could handle this but I’m not sure most days. Slowly, I can see it. My life has changed drastically, and I knew it would. Your email address will not be published. You will learn how to determine your dog’s allergies and use the right medicine and home remedies to treat the skin problem. Night before last was a living hell….last night she was perfect. I love this puppy and he’s pretty perfect but sometimes I’m like, why do I dovthis to myself? Or maybe you were looking for a daily walking partner to accompany you on your weight loss journey. We had him for over 13 years & then had to put him down. They are 9 months a week apart in age. Thanks in advance. I’m bewildered at how emotionally and physically drained I feel. Maybe they will actually be willing to help more than originally planned (or not, they didn’t want a dog). And some puppies bite more than others (I’m blessed with one that bites/mouths a lot!). Fast forward 3 months later and I am no longer vomiting every morning and have gained back all the weight I’ve lost. It’s true that some dogs are just slow learners, so don’t beat yourself up over it if you’re following good practice and he’s taking a long time to learn. Regarding my own journey, having a baby Weimaraner in the house can make you wonder if you did the right thing for sure, but not really any more or less than the first week or two with a new baby human… I’ve done both and found the experience similarly taxing, except that with a dog the phases pass very quickly. I think philosophically wants invite more stress than needs. just look at that face, those eyes. I’m just looking for a little cooperation from her. I’m so sorry. The first few days have passed. Hang in there with those two puppies! Whats worse is that I already told all my friends about him, posted his photo all over my IG and now I don’t know how to face the judgement from people in my life if I do end up rehoming him. And if it gets to the point where you can't physically handle it then of course don't sacrifice your body, but it does typically get better, I'm so happy your second experience went so much better. I told Josh I wouldn’t get a second dog if I could go back in time. I’d say don’t make a rash decision to give up until you’re past the first month at least. Even the best thought out decisions does not always go as smoothly as planned! But I was also determined that if it were at all possible, we were going to make it with this guy. I can’t explain why I decided to get a puppy. I'm scaring both my husband and myself with my rapid heart rates, trouble sleeping, lack of appetite, and now making myself physically ill. You are so transparent & real that it somehow gives us permission to be, too. I’m not sure what to say. He is changing every day and my sweet girl is growing older without me noticing because the male is always in my face. I am like main carer for him. When he would get so hyper-excited out running and playing in the yard that he would bodyslam me, and leap at my arms to the point where I had bruises. I am wondering whether our human dog owners are more stressed than the wild dog moms; if yes, why? Linus started my journey to working with rescues, fostering, and puppy raising. I’m 63 now. First week is rough, but by the end of one month things have settled into a rhythm. We have really worked on making the crate a safe space. I asked my husband when I got home and he didn’t even question it and said just say yes. It’s good to know I’m not the only one that feels this way from time to time. I’m 22, I thought, I can’t look after a dog, I can’t even look after myself! you thought this thru and you knew exactly what you wanted. I live in an apartment so it is extremely difficult to crate train him as he has a very high pitched cry and I am afraid the neighbors will eventually complain to my landlord (whom I have yet to notify). 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